Thursday, October 9, 2008

Separation anxiety

I think separation anxiety has officially hit my poor Bear. I just don't know the best way to get him over it. The only time I leave him with anyone is when I go to the gym, which is usually 2-3 times a week. He was fine with it from the beginning (when he was around 5 months old)--he had a favorite lady and he appeared to even have fun with the toys in there. Ever since a week or so ago, he has absolutely hated it. He has not wanted to go to anyone, even his favorite person, and has been clinging to me so that I have to loosen his grip on my shirt before I can hand him over. Then, when I come back from working out, usually in about an hour, I am greeted by a red-eyed, snotty-nosed baby that can't calm down until we are on the highway back home, where he falls asleep. I'm just not sure what's best at this stage and I'm getting conflicting advice. My mom friends tell me that I should leave him for shorter periods of time so that he starts to realize that I'm coming back. One friend told me that she did this with her son and started with only leaving him for 15 minutes at a time. Call me selfish or whatever, but I am not driving all the way to the gym for a 15 minute workout. So I tried half an hour today and that's probably what I'll do the next few times to see if it works. I did get grilled by the childcare worker today, though. She wanted to know why I wasn't gone for as long as I usually am, so I told her what I was trying. She told me that she's been working with kids for a long time and that he'll get over it, even if I go for my normal hour. So now I don't know what to do. I don't want to traumatize the little guy and sometimes I feel selfish for even going to the gym. But, dang it, I'm supposed to go the gym! I need to lose weight, I need some alone time and I need to make exercise a regular part of my routine! So help me out--if you have any words of wisdom, please share!

1 comment:

abbysmom said...

Is he that way with you and Max at home? It may help to do the 15 minute thing at home (like take a walk or something). I know it will pass, but it's a pain just trying to get thru it. Abby still does that sometimes, too.