How sad is this?

Bear just does not want to take a nap while I am babysitting! I think he's afraid he'll miss out on all the fun. So after rocking him for over an hour today, I gave up and put him in his highchair while I was making lunch. I handed him a cucumber slice, which you'll notice ended up between the straps on the highchair.

On another note, I am feeling much better today and I really appreciate those of you that emailed, called and commented with suggestions for getting rid of my stress. I think I just need some more alone time and am going to try for some this weekend. We'll see how that goes.

Moody

I am in a BAAAAAD mood today, everyone. I have no idea what has brought it on, but I am no fun to be around today. I kind of feel sorry for Bear, since he has to hang with me. He is definitely not the source of the mood and I don't typically take my bad mood out on the wrong people anyway, so I'm not worried. He's still young enough that I can fake happiness and he'll buy it! The mood I'm in has made me annoyed at the dogs and how many times they have wanted in and out the door today. It is very hot and humid out and I don't want the back door open for half the day because the dogs can't make up their minds about which side of it is better. I won't take out my mood on them, either, I promise. I'm also annoyed at the state of our house, but I don't feel like doing anything to make it better. I should clean and maybe redecorate, but I just don't want to right now. Everything just seems blah in here.

I've decided all my clothes look bad on me and I'd like to invite Stacy London and Clinton Kelly over to throw them all out. I actually did put together a fairly large pile of clothes to donate just a bit ago. My body is definitely different than before I had Bear! Not necessarily a lot bigger, just different. I really need to get some new clothes, but I just can't justify spending very much money on them, since I'm home most of the time. A prime example of my need is my swimsuit. I've been wearing the same one for the last 6 or 7 years. Over those years, I've lost and gained weight, I've been pregnant, I've had a baby and my tastes have changed (not to mention the styles!). I really need a new suit, but I was just looking online at some and the ugly ones on sale at J.C. stinkin' Penney's are 60 bucks! What is up with them being so expensive? I'm going to just have to suck it up and get one, I suppose. With the amount I plan on taking Bear swimming, the money won't be wasted.

Also, I don't know why, but I feel stressed. I have nothing to be worried about, but I have this weird feeling that something is hanging over me. It's kind of the same feeling I used to get in college around exam time. There was so much to do and it was all happening so fast that I just couldn't fathom getting through it every semester. I did, though, and I even did it to myself again in grad school! Hopefully it's not just the way I'm doomed to feel while raising a child. There is lots to do with a baby, but surely that's not what's making me feel this way??

After reading over what I just wrote, I'm realizing that it sounds like I'm needing a change. Hopefully I don't sound like a spoiled brat, but I think staying home most of the time and interacting with the same people/pets all the time is getting to me--especially because the individuals (Bear, dogs, cat) I spend most of my days with cannot talk and are always needing something. Hmm...maybe it's time for a vacation or a break or something.

Or maybe it's PMS!! That's a fun thought. I'm not usually too bothered by the monthly stuff, but I'm trying to see if I have a normal cycle by just not taking any birth control this month (sorry if that's more than you wanted to know about me!). That was my problem when I was trying to get pregnant with Bear--no regularity/predictability whatsoever, so I took Clomid to fix that. I'm kind of curious as to whether or not having a baby changed my body the way that so many people have told me that it did for them. So when in doubt, blame moodiness on hormones, right??

Bear is napping right now and we're going grocery shopping after he wakes up. Hopefully, that will bring me at least a little out of my funk. Although shopping for groceries isn't the most fun in the world, it'll get me out of the house and I usually feel better when I'm doing something. Sitting around wondering why I'm in such a crappy mood isn't going to make it any better! Also, I feel a little better after writing this. I guess it just made me think about what is actually bothering me, if anything. Hopefully, my next post will be a happier one!

Weekend

Bear doesn't seem to be too traumatized by my forgetfulness with the monitor the other night. He slept all night in his crib last night--something that hasn't happened much recently. He has been raring to go at about 4 am over the past couple of weeks, and that is WAY too early for me, so I have been taking him into our room for a few more hours of sleep. That's not been going too badly, actually. Bear likes to snuggle (but I don't!) when he sleeps, though, so there has been more than one morning where I've woken to my body on just a sliver of the bed and Bear's little tiny body all spread out in the middle! I really don't mind him being in there for a few hours, but I don't want to do that forever. The nights that he spends the entire night in his crib, like last night, give me hope for the future.

My dad was here last weekend and I think he had fun with Bear. We didn't do much--he got here lat Friday afternoon and left Sunday morning, so we didn't have much time. We went out to eat on Friday night. We went to a restaurant that had a buffet, so I fed Bear some food off my plate and boy, did he love it! He tried mashed potatoes and lima beans for the first time and my dad even gave him a little taste of banana pudding! He had even already eaten his own dinner, but he just kept taking little bites from mine! Oh well, I guess he decided that was the night for him to branch out.

On Saturday, we went shopping at Sam's. Now, I'm all about getting a good deal, so I was excited to see what Sam's could offer me. I know that Sam's mostly caters to small businesses, but I hear lots of families talk about going there, too, so I thought it was worth a shot. Let me tell you, it was not. Maybe on some stuff they can offer good deals, but on diapers and formula, they do not. They are exactly the same price that you can find them elsewhere, they just come in bigger packages. And really, who has the extra space? Actually, I found diapers at Target for quite a bit cheaper this week. They were on clearance for some reason--do diapers expire?? Anyhow, I loaded up, so we should be good on those for a while. At least I know that Max and I don't need a Sam's membership. (We were shopping with my dad's card on Saturday.)

That's about it for the weekend! Bear and I are headed to the gym this morning, and then hopefully, if he's not too tired, to the pool. Don't worry, I will be using sunscreen this time!

Bad Momma Moment

For those of you that let your child "cry it out" at some point in his or her life, you may as well stop reading now because I'm probably going to sound like a huge wimp to you. If you're still reading, you must be interested in my story, so here goes:

Last night was one of the worst nights we've had in this house for a long time. It all started when I did (or actually didn't) something that I've feared that I would do since we moved Bear into his own bedroom: I forgot to turn the volume up on the baby monitor. I woke up kind of startled at 12:30. I wasn't sure why I woke up, so I figured I must need to visit the bathroom. I stood up to head that way and glanced at the clock on my nightstand, which is right next to the monitor. The monitor has a series of lights that let you know how loud your baby is crying, and every light on that thing was lit up! I freaked out and ran to Bear's room, where I found him completely turned around from how I had laid him and he was up on his hands and knees. He was crying in a manner that I have not heard him do in at least a couple months: very short, rapid bursts. He used to cry like this when he was at his absolute worst, so I knew he'd been crying for a while. The bed was wet, so I assumed his diaper leaked, but when I picked him up I realized that the dampness was due to tears and snot. My heart BROKE. I picked him up and hugged him tight, apologizing the whole time. I rocked him and fed him, but I could NOT get him to go back in his crib. I'm sure he was thinking that I was going to abandon him again. Or maybe not. Maybe he was just wide awake and didn't want to be alone. Who knows? All I know is that I took him into our bed and let him spend the whole night next to me, which is a very rare thing. I'm sure he's forgotten all about it now, since he's happily napping away in his crib as I write, but it will be a LONG time before I forget. And I think I'll probably wake up multiple times during the next few nights to make sure I turned up the monitor.

Busy, busy, busy!

We've been busy (as you may have guessed from the title) around here for the past few days! Bear turned 6 months old on Tuesday and we really wanted professional 6 month pictures of him, so I made an appointment at a new place here in town. It was a pretty good experience, other than the fact that we spent too much. If you've been keeping up with my blog, you may remember that I complained about spending too much when we got the 3 month pictures taken. Well, this time I invited Max, just to prevent such a thing from happening. My plan failed. Max spent even more than I did! He just got caught up in the difficulties of having to turn down some of the poses. Now he's all fired up and ready for when we do pictures next, which may not be at 9 months as we'd originally planned, since we've spent so much on pics already! Oh well, we take plenty of pictures at home, really. It's just nice to have professional ones done, too.

Later on Tuesday night, we went out for Mexican food. For some reason, the person seating us thought Bear was old enough for a booster seat, so we tried it out. He kept almost sliding out and under the table, so I turned him around to where he was facing me. That worked much better. I was able to feed him his dinner while we were waiting for our food to come and while Daddy and Momma sipped on much needed margaritas! While we were eating, Bear got a little bored, so I got out a little snack cup of cereal pieces we packed in his diaper bag. The lid on the cup opens in a half moon shape, presumably so kids can just get out the snacks themselves. Bear is a little young to be grabbing his own snacks, especially since he hasn't developed the skill of getting his hand to his mouth yet, but he didn't care. He wanted to get his own snacks out and he let me know that he was MAD about me moving the snack cup by throwing his very FIRST TEMPER TANTRUM!!! He started waving his fists and crying very loudly for a few minutes. Max and I just looked at each other and laughed...we couldn't believe his reaction to not getting what he wanted. We've both seen him be frustrated by not being able to reach something or by having us try and change his diaper when he's ready to eat, but nothing like what we saw that night! It was funny, but I think we're in for more tantrums with this boy!

Yesterday, Bear had his 6 month check up. He's still growing well. He weighs 19.7 pounds (80th percentile), he's 28 inches long (90th percentile) and his head is 44.25 cm (65th %). He did well, until he had to get some shots, of course. I was very complimentary of the nurse who administered his vaccines, however. She did it so fast, Bear only had to scream for about 30 seconds. We've realized that he's quickly fixed with a bottle of formula. We get to wait until he's 9 months old for another check up, and that one won't include any shots. There is a finger prick to test for anemia, but that shouldn't be nearly as traumatic for the boy.

When we got home from the doctor, we had visits from our friends Ericka, Kayli and Julia; the Orkin man and the UPS man! Look what the UPS man brought:


A new wagon from Grandma Susan and Granddad Ted! Stuart wanted to get in on the fun, too:


Then, Stuart decided there wasn't much room, so he got out and pushed:


That wasn't much fun. Stuart's not too strong, so Bear got out and pushed:


Stuart was saw that Bear was stronger than he, so he thought this would be the best idea of all:


Thank you Grandma Susan and Granddad Ted!! We love the walker wagon!

Updated update

The tooth is here!! A little corner of the tooth came through. It happened so quickly! I honestly think it broke the skin while I was working out. I dropped Bear off at the gym child care and when I picked him up I checked the spot where said tooth would be, and there it was!

Also, I keep meaning to blog about this and keep forgetting, so while the boy is napping I'll tell you a funny story. Bear and I went to the library for story time the other day and then went to lunch with some friends. Bear fell asleep on the way to lunch and slept the entire time I was at the restaurant. It was nice just to talk with friends and not worry about him grabbing stuff off the table or getting bored, but he is HEAVY in his car seat. He hasn't quite grown out of his infant seat, so I've still been using it just for occasions such as this--the new one won't come out of the car, so if he falls asleep while we're out, I'll just have to wake him. Anyhow, since he was sleeping, I decided to go to the grocery store, where I can set his seat in the cart and he can continue snoozing. I did just that--loaded him into the cart and headed into the store. As I was pushing the cart into the store, an employee stopped me and said something like Awww, you've got your baby in there sleeping! Or wait, is that your grandbaby? I must have looked shocked, because the kid looked all surprised and I said Grandbaby?? Are you kidding me?? I'm not quite there yet!! In the kid's defense, we do live in Mississippi and I'm too lazy to look it up, but I'm pretty sure this is some sort of teenage pregnancy capital of the United States. So, if I'd had a kid when lots of people here have kids (16 or so) and then he or she had a kid at 16 as well, I guess I would be of grandparenting age. I was offended until I thought about that. I was just thinking that I needed a SERIOUS makeover if I look like somebody's grandma already! And don't get me wrong grandparents...there are lots of people out there that are most definitely grandparents that don't look old enough to be, but come on! To guess that I am a grandmother, I would think that I would have some characteristics of an older looking person. I have zero gray hairs and not many wrinkles (at least not deep ones!) and I even get told pretty often that I look younger than my age. So there.

Weekend update

It has been a laid back weekend around here. The three of us went out to lunch and shopping together on Saturday and of course, that means Bear scored a couple new toys! Max and I always do that--we went out to look at umbrella strollers because we're going to need one soon, and we ended up buying toys for our boy. Oh well, we found a small stroller we liked and are probably going to end up getting anyhow and Bear likes the toys, so I guess everybody wins. We did absolutely NOTHING on Sunday. It was extremely hot and humid outside, so we just stayed in and played with Bear.

Bear has not been sleeping too well over the past week or so (actually over his whole life, but it's been worse over the past week), but I think I know why now. He has a tooth that is very, very close to breaking through on the bottom left. It is all swollen and he's been chewing on anything he can get his hands on. Usually it's his hands, but he also likes to wad up my shirts and chew on them. I hope it doesn't take too long for that tooth to show up! He seems to be in some pain and I don't like my baby to hurt. We've given him Orajel, Tylenol, and teething tablets (not all at the same time, of course!) to try and relieve some pain for him and they all seem to help, but just a little. If nothing else, the Tylenol and the teething tablets calm him down so he can sleep, so that's a plus.

I know I just keep boring everyone by writing about him being ready to crawl, but he's taken it a step further. He's been getting on his hands and knees and rocking back and forth for a few days, but yesterday, he decided to move a little. He was on his hands and knees doing the rocking thing, but then he moved his knees forward, one at a time. His hands didn't move, so he fell over within a few seconds. He doesn't quite have the movements down, but I have a boy genius on my hands here, so I'm sure he'll get it soon. And then he'll be EVERYWHERE! He has started complaining and arching his back when he no longer wants to be held, so we usually just set him on the floor. When he's on the floor, he works on crawling practice until he gets tired and then he starts either rolling around or turning in circles while he's on his stomach. This boy wants to MOVE!

Catch up

I feel like I don't have much to report, but when I think about it, Mr. Bear and I have been quite busy over the past couple of days. We've been to story time at the library, out to lunch with friends, to the grocery store, to the park, to the gym and back to the grocery store to pick up some forgotten things. That's a lot of stuff for only 2 days and Bear's been getting so much better at the running around deal. He used to get cranky after only one or two stops, and now he'll just fall asleep if he's tired. I think it helps that he can mostly sit up, which allows him to use highchairs at restaurants and seats in shopping carts. He definitely likes to be independent and those things help him to do just that.

Speaking of being independent, the boy is SERIOUSLY getting ready to crawl and I am so excited and proud! People keep telling me that I won't like it when he crawls because he'll get into everything. While I'm sure that's somewhat true, I'm pretty sure I'm going to be so happy for him just because he will be so happy. He has wanted to lunge out of my arms since just a few days after he was born and when he can finally rely on himself to get around, I think he will be very fun. He's never been what I would call a relaxed baby and I'm hoping his self reliance will help with that a little. More and more, he just wants to be set on the floor to play. He doesn't want his Exersaucer, he doesn't want his Jumperoo horse and he definitely doesn't want to be held by Momma! He wants to do it himself. He loves when I set his little rug on the floor and surround him with toys, but arrange it so that he can still see me. I've put that little rug in just about every room in our house at this point, including the bathroom!

The other little milestone that Bear just hit yesterday was making a squealing sound when he's happy or excited. He laughs at our dogs A LOT--when they jump onto the couch, when they play-fight, when they bark at someone at the door, or even when they just walk past him! For some reason, he finds them hilarious! Anyhow, late yesterday afternoon, he was in his Exersaucer and Stuart (the male dog) was really rowdy--the kind of rowdy where he runs from room to room really fast and gets himself out of breath. Bear was laughing pretty hard and all of the sudden just started squealing. I've heard my friends' babies do this, so I wasn't shocked or anything, but I was quite amused. When Max came home from work, he got the dogs all worked up by playing with them, and Bear started squealing again. It's so cute. I hope he keeps doing it for a while.

Swimming

Today Bear and I invited some friends over to swim in our neighborhood pool. Bear had an absolute blast! He loved the water and kicked his little legs the whole time. He loved being in his float, but he also liked just having me hold him in the water. I definitely have to take him to the pool more often, but I think we'll wait until my evil sunburn has healed. Of course, I not only slathered the boy in sunscreen and put a hat on him, but I also made sure his float had a roof. Anyhow, he's still as pale as ever. His momma, however, looks more like a lobster.

Here he is up close:


Here he is a little farther away:


Here he is enjoying the company of his friend Kaitlyn:

The boy is a vegetarian for now!

At our last appointment, our pediatrician gave us a feeding chart that told us when we could introduce different foods to Bear. The chart said that we could start with vegetables, then feed him meats, then fruits. The doctor said we could feed fruits whenever we wanted, but the chart puts them last so that babies don't get used to the sweet taste of them and then only prefer sweet things. Apparently, there's been some research lately that says that's a load of horse hockey, so Bear's been eating just about any fruits and vegetables that are appropriate for his age. Well, a few months ago, I got baby food happy and bought all different kinds of jarred commercial baby food. Bear's eaten just about everything I bought, but there has been this lone little jar of chicken in the cabinet for some time. I decided to try it today, and all I can really say is EEEEEWWWWW! I opened it and sniffed just out of curiosity, and was I ever sorry! It was more pungent than the wet food we feed to our dogs. If I based what I fed to Bear on smell, though, he'd never get any formula, because that doesn't smell especially appetizing. I thought maybe that was just how baby food smells, so I put some in a bowl and prepared to feed the boy. The dogs were begging at my feet since I opened the jar, by the way, just to give you an idea of how strongly it smelled. They sat right under the highchair for the two bites that Bear tried and then they finished the meal for him. Bear ended up opting for a mixture of sweet potatoes, peas and potatoes for lunch. Needless to say, meat is off the menu for a while. I've been making most of Bear's food anyhow, although some of it he prefers jarred. Peas, for example...I don't know if it's a texture thing or what, but he prefers the jarred kind, so I indulge him. He loves all the fruit I've made so far though and if I mix some formula in the veggies, he'll usually eat them. I'm not quite sure how to make meat for babies. I'll have to do some research, but I'm not worried about it for now. I've definitely learned my lesson for the day: If it smells bad, feed it to the dogs.

Guess who's just about ready to crawl?!

Adventures in babysitting

Well, we are all feeling better now and I babysat my neighbor's son, Jacob, today. I will be babysitting him every Thursday morning from now through August, so I should get lots of practice with a 21 month old before Bear hits that age. I was a little nervous for two reasons: 1)His mother brought Jacob over yesterday, just so he could see my house before he was left here and, man, that kid was ALL OVER THE PLACE. At one point, he brought me a screwdriver, and I was all Where did you get that???!! He ran into each room, checking it out and grabbing something any chance he got. 2) I've done lots of babysitting, but never for a very young baby and a toddler at the same time. Most of the kids I babysat were older, and therefore more self sufficient.

Contrary to my fears, the babysitting went very well! I learned quite a few things during the few hours that I had another kid in my house:

*Have an activity or a routine planned, if at all possible. Kids do bad stuff (like throw blocks at my baby) when they are bored.

*Cabinet locks are a MUST. I realized this both when I discovered my Christmas candles on the floor and when Jacob handed me a bottle of disinfectant.

*Television remotes + toddlers= bad news. It took a good while to find the batteries to mine.

*Lids on cups are a good idea. I cleaned lemonade and milk off my kitchen floor today.

*Always have durable cloths handy in the kitchen--especially if you feed a kid peanut butter and jelly.

*Kids think empty cardboard boxes are awesome--way more awesome than any toy you could offer them.

Here's the most important thing I learned, though:

* I CAN SO DO THIS!! I have been worried for months that Bear would end up an only child. I never wanted this for him in theory, but I thought he took up so much of my time and attention that I wouldn't be able to focus on another child. WRONG. I can definitely handle both of them. Now, I admit, I've only done the multiple child thing for one day so far, but it was so much easier than I thought it would be. I thought I would be worn out and need a nap when Jacob's mother came to pick him up, but I'm fine! This is very exciting for me to have learned this and I'm really glad I took on the babysitting. I can't wait to share this with Max...I'm pretty sure he'll be overjoyed.

Check out Jacob and Bear playing together today. Bear was so interested in everything Jacob was doing, he was actually calmer than he is when he's the only kid around! By the way, I'm holding Bear up in the picture, even though it doesn't look like it. He can sit up on his own for about 1 minute, but not if he's looking around and playing.

We should be quarantined!

This house is not the most pleasant place to be right now, since we've all been sick since yesterday in some form or another. Max stayed home from work yesterday, complaining of cold-like symptoms. Bear and I were fine yesterday morning, so we headed to the gym and then to meet the MOMS at an outdoor mall. We hung around for a while, not really wanting to come home to a sick Daddy, but eventually we made it back. Max pretty much stayed in bed all day, with the exception of his excursion to Walgreens--apparently the only cold medicine we had in the cabinet had expired 2 years ago!** Bear's nose started running a little in the middle of the afternoon and I became suspicious. Then, he started with the coughing and sneezing. Poor baby--I'm pretty sure he's got his first cold. He's acting okay today, although he slept later than normal and he's a little clingy. He doesn't have a fever, but you can bet if he gets one, we will be racing to the doctor's office. I, on the other hand, don't seem to have the cold, but I'm experiencing some sort of stomach mess that I won't even discuss. Anyhow, I was up for a good part of the night with that or with the boy, so I opted to sleep late with Bear. Maybe I'll be napping with him today, as well. Hopefully I won't get the cold that the men have experienced, but I have to admit, it's pretty likely. I sleep in the same bed that Max sleeps in, of course, and Bear drools on me all day long. It wouldn't be too hard for germs from them to get to me. Let's just hope they don't, or I may have to ask Max to stay home from work again!

Speaking of Max, how unfair is this? Whenever he gets sick, he sleeps all day and then seems miraculously better by that evening or at the latest, the next day. For example, yesterday, he slept virtually all day and then was outside weed-eating last night! I asked him if that was necessary, with him being sick and all, and he said he felt better. What's up with that? I guarantee you that if I get this cold, I will not be well enough for yard work after one day of rest. Not to mention that I'll have a baby (maybe a SICK baby) to take care of, too. Oh well, such is life.

**We haven't even lived here a full 2 years, so I'm not sure why we moved expired medicine, but whatever!

Little Firecracker

I didn't get a chance to post yesterday--we were at a neighbor's house for most of the day and then I was too tired by the time we got home. We had a good 4th, although Bear took virtually no naps. We even took along his Pack N Play, but he was just too busy with the neighbor's children to take the time out. Surprisingly, he was in a good mood for much of the time...even with no sleep. He also slept well last night, which baffles me. Usually, when he doesn't sleep well during the day, he doesn't sleep well at night, either. He is always changing on us! Oh well, I'll take the good changes! We did get some excellent pictures of our "Little Firecracker" yesterday:

Bear at the gym

Well, after I wrote that nice long post on Tuesday, Bear and I headed for the gym. I took Bear to the child care room, just as I had done for the past two gym visits. Bear was doing well under the care of some very nice ladies, so I didn't worry about him at all. Every time I came in after my workout, he was smiling and enjoying the experience. Tuesday was a very different story. I came in after my workout and saw the 9 month old daughter of one of my friends, so I started to go to her and say hello, when I heard the loudest baby screams I've ever heard and I thought Oh my gosh, that's my kid! I looked for him and realized that he was in the separate room they have for babies to sleep in. One of the ladies was attempting to change his diaper and he was fidgeting and screaming the whole time. I took over the diaper change and asked what happened. All she did was set him down so she could use the restroom, and he would NOT stop screaming! Apparently, it had been going on for about 10 minutes before I came in there. He was probably a little overtired, since he got up a little earlier than normal that day, but my gosh, he would not settle down! He cried so hard that formula started coming out his nose! Needless to say, I felt horrible and was pretty sure everyone in the place was looking at me thinking That poor inexperienced girl...Doesn't she know how to calm her own kid down?? Well, sometimes I don't. I just couldn't do it, but neither could the lady who worked in there and she has like 10 years of experience working with babies! He didn't stop until we got outside, where he proceeded to start up again when I tried putting him in his car seat. He fell asleep on the way home, though, and we stayed home the rest of the day to give the poor boy a break from chaos.

You might guess that I would be nervous about taking Bear back to the gym with me, and you'd be right about that. I realize that he's going to fuss sometimes, but I don't want to torture him! The kind of screaming he was doing in there was worse than the screaming he's done when he had to get shots. Seriously. My mom and my friends all told me that I should try again, though. They gave me good reasons: 1) Bear has to get used to people other than his Momma and 2) Momma could really use the exercise and the time by herself. As it turns out, my mom (as usual) was right and so were my friends. I made the attempt again today, fully expecting them to come get me 10 minutes into my workout to tell me that they couldn't calm him down. I made it through the whole workout and thought that he'd be throwing some kind of fit when I got into the child care room, but was I ever surprised! I walked in and they had him strapped into his car seat and he was just watching the older kids play. The woman taking care of him said he didn't cry, not even once! She took him out of his seat for a little while, but when more kids started showing up, she had to set him down. I guess he was just in a better mood today, and now, so am I. I was so worried about leaving him and was even starting to wonder if I was being selfish by wanting to go back. Now I see that it's good for both of us to have time away from each other, even if it is only 45 minutes a few times a week. I'm going again on Saturday, but Bear is going to stay home with Max. That hasn't happened since Bear was very little, so hopefully it'll go well. I have faith, though! Max can do it! And even if he can't or Bear won't stop crying or something, he probably won't let me know about it. That's probably good.

I am not as excited about this weekend as I once was. My dad and his wife were going to come visit us, but they had to cancel because his wife's mother had a stroke. She lives in Ohio and they are going there instead to be with her. I completely understand, but I'm still disappointed. I don't get to see my dad too often. My mom lives close enough that she has been able to visit about once a month since Bear was born, but Dad has a job with strict hours and doesn't live as close. Also, I talk to my mom at least once a day, so I don't miss her as badly. My dad, on the other hand, isn't much of a phone person. Sometimes we'll get into a long conversation, but usually our best talks are had in person. Plus, he gets up early like Bear, so we would have had time together alone in the mornings. Oh well, he's going to try to make the trip in a couple of weeks, so it's not too bad. It's just that Bear is doing so much more than he was a few months ago when my dad was here last, and I was eager to share that. By the time Dad gets here, though, I'm sure Bear will be doing even more, so I'll have that to look forward to now.

Busy day

Wow, I think this is the earliest I've ever been online, other than those mornings in grad school when I had to finish up a paper! Bear has decided that 5:30 is a good time to wake up lately. It's not that bad, I guess. I get between 7 and 8 hours of sleep, so I can't really complain, except that he goes back to sleep around 6:30 and I can't usually do that! Also, he goes back to sleep in my arms and refuses to get back in his crib. Can you believe I'm typing with an almost 20 pound baby in my lap? There are lots of backspaces and deletes, let me tell you!**

Anyhow, we had a really busy day yesterday--so busy that I didn't have a free moment to post about it! We started off slowly, but we had lunch with the MOMS club at 11:00. We went to a fairly new restaurant in town and it was really fun. We were able to sit outside, even though it was pretty hot here. The restaurant has a big, shaded porch with lots of ceiling fans, so it was actually very comfortable. Bear decided to skip his morning nap, so he crashed in his stroller right at 11:00 when we got there. He slept until 12:00, so I was able to stay there until about 1:30 chatting with other moms without him getting grouchy! Yesterday was also his first experience eating solid food away from home. I, being the great mom that I am, packed up all his food and various required accessories, but I forgot a bib for him! We had to borrow a bib from Bear's friend Kaitlyn, which happened to be pink and polka dotted. I didn't take any pictures--I didn't think he'd appreciate the humor in that later!

After the lunch and lots of chatting, we headed to Lowe's to pick up a doorstop that broke off one of our doors. A visit to Lowe's always takes a long time, since I used to work there. I don't necessarily want to say hello to every single person I know, but I don't want to be rude, either! There are some people that I genuinely enjoy talking to, though, so it makes for a long trip. Needless to say, I don't go in there too often. Since we were in there getting the doorstop anyhow, we went ahead and picked up a little rug for Bear's room. It's not available online (that I can find!), or I'd share a picture with you, but it's made by Tonka and has little roads, bridges and parking lots on it. It came with two little dump trucks, which Bear is too little to play with yet, but the rug makes a good playmat by itself for now.

After all that, I didn't feel like making dinner, so Max and I went out (again, I know!) to one of our favorite restaurants here. They just changed locations and the new one is so nice! They added lots of stuff to their menu, and everything we tried turned out to be really good. We definitely need to make plans to go there more often. Even Bear enjoyed it. Of course, he didn't try any of the food, but he really liked the waterfall wall they've added to the decor. AND, he sat in one of their high chairs for nearly 30 minutes! This is great, because typically when we go out to eat, one of us has to hold him. He's growing up and becoming more independent!

In a little while, we're going to head to the gym so I can work off all that food I ate yesterday! Just kidding, I actually made fairly healthy choices yesterday, so I shouldn't have much to work off, but Bear has a date in the child care room today. His friend Kaitlyn's mom, Nancy, belongs to the same gym and we agreed to meet there this morning and work out together. It might be kind of hard, since I will be doing circuit work and therefore moving around a lot, but it's motivating to have someone else there waiting to meet you.

After the gym, hopefully Bear will be tired and take a good nap, because I have to clean, clean, clean! My dad and his wife will be here this weekend, and I haven't cleaned the bonus room from when my mom was here weekend before last yet. I also just need to do general cleaning around the house. I'm usually pretty good about keeping up with it, but for some reason this past week was an exception. I also need to work on some baby-proofing. One of my friends in the neighborhood is a CPA and has to take some classes in order to remain certified. I agreed to babysit her almost 2 year old son on Thursday mornings in July and August, but our house is probably not quite ready for a toddler. My friend is going to come over to acquaint her son with my house, but also to tell me if we have stuff out that she knows he'll get into or break. I'm sure we do, but it can be moved or put away for now. Besides, this will give me good practice!

**I was able to put Bear in his crib at about the 2nd paragraph, so don't think I've been struggling with holding that heavy boy this whole time!